Parashat Yitro- Cultivating Religious Realism
Parashat Yitro begins with the arrival of Yitro, Moshe’s father-in-law, at Beneh Yisrael’s encampment in the desert. Yitro, who had belonged to the nation of Midyan, heard about the miraculous events that Beneh Yisrael experienced, and decided to join them. He heard about the ten plagues that God brought upon Egypt, the miracle of the Exodus, the splitting of the sea, and Beneh Yisrael’s supernatural military victory over the nation of Amalek. The news of these miracles inspired Yitro to leave his homeland and join Beneh Yisrael in the wilderness.
The Torah relates that upon Yitro’s arrival, Moshe told him all that Hashem had done for Beneh Yisrael, freeing them from Egypt and assisting them during their travels in the desert (18:8). The obvious question arises, why did Moshe convey all this information to Yitro, who was already well aware of these events? After all, as mentioned, the news of these miracles is what led Yitro to come join Beneh Yisrael in the first place. As soon as Moshe began speaking, Yitro should have told him, "Yes, yes, I heard all this already, and this is precisely why I came!" Why did Yitro listen to Moshe repeat to him all these events?
One answer is that Moshe related to Yitro the aspects of Beneh Yisrael’s experiences that Yitro had not heard. Yitro heard the inspiring stories of the miracles, triumph and salvation. Moshe now wanted to dispel the possible misconception that belonging to Beneh Yisrael is all about miracles and glorious experiences, that everything always runs smoothly and there is never anything to worry about or feel distressed about. Moshe sat down with his father-in-law and told him the parts of the story that did not likely make the "headlines." He described the sense of panic and crisis that gripped Beneh Yisrael as they found themselves trapped against the sea, and the tensions that erupted, with different factions lobbying for different strategies. He also explained to Yitro the less-than-rosy background to the battle against Amalek, when Beneh Yisrael had been lax in their commitment to God and He therefore sent a cruel nation to wage war against them. Moshe wanted to ensure that Yitro would not harbor any unrealistic expectations as he joined Beneh Yisrael. It was important that Yitro realize that being a Jew is sometimes complicated and demanding. Difficult problems and challenges arise. It’s not only about the splitting of the sea; it’s also about struggle and hurdling formidable obstacles.
This insight presents an important lesson relevant to education. It is of course critically important to build our children’s self-confidence and self-esteem, to insist that they could achieve great things and success. And we must also emphasize to them the beauty of Torah and Misvot, and the unparalleled satisfaction that it brings a person. But this encouragement must be tempered with realism. If our children are left with the impression that life as a Torah Jew is all about glory and success, they will be terribly disillusioned. Without doubt, Torah life is beautiful and brings us joy and meaning that could not be achieved in any other way. And we must, indeed, convey this message to our children. But at the same time, we must prepare them for the challenges that arise. They must be taught to understand – just as Moshe advised Yitro – that it’s not always easy or fun. Sometimes it gets difficult and complicated. This is the dual message that we must teach our children, inspiring them with the unparalleled beauty of Torah, while preparing them for the challenges that it often presents us.
