Parashat Vayishlah- What We’ve Learned From Today’s “Laban”
Parashat Vayishlah begins with the message of reconciliation that Yaakob sends to his brother, Esav, as he makes his way back to Eretz Yisrael. Yaakob informs his brother, "Im Laban Garti" – "I have dwelled with Laban." Rashi famously notes that the word "Garti" in this phrase has the same letters as "Taryag" – the representation of the number 613. Yaakob essentially told Esav, in Rashi’s words, "I have dwelled with Laban, but I observed the 613 Misvot and have not learned from his evil ways."
Rav Yaakov Ruderman (1901-1987), former head of Yeshivat Ner Yisrael in Baltimore, noted the seemingly redundant phrasing of Rashi’s comment: "I observed the 613 Misvot and have not learned from his evil ways." Why does Yaakob avow that he both "observed the 613 Misvot" and did not "learn from his evil ways"? Are these not one and the same?
Rav Ruderman inferred from Rashi’s remarks that, indeed, it is possible for a person to strictly observe all 613 commandments, but still follow the "evil ways" of Laban. Even if one adheres to the strictest standards of Halachic observance, he can still conduct himself like Laban; it is possible for him to follow the behavior patterns of the gentile society in which he lives.
Unfortunately, there is likely no better example of this phenomenon than contemporary American Orthodox Jewry. Many of us can, Baruch Hashem, truly profess to observe the Misvot, to strictly adhere to the demands of Halacha. At the same time, however, the vast majority of even strictly observant Jews have learned from Laban’s evil ways, have taken example from the immoral culture in which we live. While most Orthodox Jews follow Halachic guidelines of modest dress, far too few conduct themselves modestly when it comes to displaying their wealth at their affairs and celebrations. Scores of prominent Rabbis are invited to today’s weddings to ensure that the ceremony is conducted properly, but too many weddings are plagued by what one contemporary Rabbi called "vulgar excess," such as ostentatious flower arrangements and wasteful Viennese tables. Baruch Hashem, many men come to the synagogue punctually at dawn each weekday morning for Shaharit – but too many make a point of showing up in luxury cars to impress their fellow congregants. Clothing manufacturers produce clothing for Jewish women that meet Halachic standards, but unfortunately fashion designers have found a way to design "modest" clothing that is also seductive. Frivolous New Years’ parties, which are so antithetical to the Torah’s values of sanctity, are held with glatt Kosher food. For many Jews, their Sunday is indistinguishable from the Sunday of their gentile neighbors – an occasion for watching sports and engaging in other unproductive recreational activities – as opposed to an opportunity for learning Torah.
How do we protect ourselves from these influences of today’s "Laban"?
First and foremost, we must recognize that the problem exists, that even the observant community has been affected by the influences of modern society. If we stubbornly refuse to acknowledge the effects of this influence, we cannot possibly even begin to address it.
But secondly, it is crucial for us to protect ourselves through regular Torah study, by frequenting the Bet Midrash. By engaging our minds and souls in the purity of Torah, which has not been tainted by the influences of "Laban," we fortify ourselves and are thus able to resist those pervasive influences. We will then be able to affirm as Yaakob did – "I observed the 613 Misvot, and did not learn from his evil ways." In this way, we can ensure that we remain loyal not only to the strict letter of the Torah, but also to the spirit of the Torah – rather than embracing the spirit of today’s "Laban."
