Brought to you under the direction of The Edmond J Safra Synagogue

Situations Where a Pregnant or Nursing Woman May Remarry Immediately After Being Widowed or Divorced

The Sages enacted a provision forbidding a woman from remarrying immediately after being widowed or divorced if she is pregnant or is nursing an infant. In such a situation, she must wait until the child is twenty-four months old, which is when children would stop nursing. The Sages were concerned that since it might be more difficult to find a husband while nursing a baby, the woman might wean her baby prematurely, thus endangering the child. They therefore forbade a pregnant or nursing woman who became widowed or divorced from remarrying until the child is twenty-four months old. This applies even if the woman hired a nurse to feed the child, and even if the nurse swore to continue the job until the child reaches the age of twenty-four months. Furthermore, it applies even if the woman hired a second nurse as a potential backup in case the first quits the job, and even if the child in any event stops nursing.

There are, however, a number of circumstances under which a woman may remarry even before twenty-four months. Firstly, if the child dies, Heaven forbid, then the woman may remarry immediately. The Sages were not concerned that a woman would go so far as to kill her own child to raise her chances of finding a new husband. (And although they may be extreme cases of unstable women who would resort to such violent measures, the Sages would not enact a decree to prevent such extreme situations.) Furthermore, this prohibition does not apply if the woman had stopped nursing before the death or divorce. Since the child in any event is not nursing, there is no need to bar the woman from seeking remarriage immediately. Likewise, if the woman is physically unable to nurse, such as if she has low milk supply, or her body does not produce milk at all, then she is allowed to remarry immediately. Another exception is a case where a woman hired a wet nurse before her husband’s death or before her divorce. In this situation, too, she is allowed to remarry, since an arrangement for the infant had been made before she became widowed or divorced.

If, in a situation where this prohibition does apply, the woman remarried in violation of Halacha, then the Bet Din uses its authority to coerce the new husband to divorce the woman. It places the husband under Nidui (excommunication) until he agrees to give the wife a Get, and he pays her Ketuba. Assuming he is not a Kohen (in which case he is forbidden from marrying a divorcee), he may remarry the woman after the child reaches the age of twenty-four months, and, of course, he must write a new Ketuba.

Summary: Generally speaking, a woman who became divorced or widowed while she was pregnant or nursing may not remarry until the child reaches the age of twenty-four months. She may remarry if the infant dies, Heaven forbid. Furthermore, she is allowed to remarry immediately after becoming widowed or divorced if she had stopped nursing while she was still married to her first husband, or if she is physically incapable of nursing.