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Parashat Vayeshev- The Patriarchs and the Misva of Honoring Parents

Parashat Vayeshev tells the story of "Mechirat Yosef," the sale of Yosef into slavery by his brothers.  The brothers left home to shepherd their herds in the city of Shechem, and Yaakov asked Yosef to go see them.  The Torah tells that immediately upon hearing his father's request, Yosef replied, "Hineni" (literally, "Here I am"), expressing his eager willingness to fulfill Yaakov's command.

The Rabbis saw Yosef's response as an inspiring reflection of his commitment to the value of "Kibud Av" – respect for one's parents.  Yosef assuredly knew of his brothers' deep feelings of resentment towards him, and would not ordinarily join them alone in an open field, where they could easily kill him.  Yet, not only did Yosef agree to fulfill his father's wishes, he never even hesitated, not even for a moment.  He replied, "Hineni," declaring that he was ready and prepared to do whatever his father asked; he expressed complete and unconditional loyalty to his father, to the point where he was even prepared to risk his life to obey his commands.

Rabbi Haim Palachi (Turkey, 1788-1869), in his work "Tochehat Haim," observes how all three patriarchs – Avraham, Yishak and Yaakov – excelled in this quality of "Kibud Av."  The Sages teach that when God ordered Avraham to leave his homeland and relocate in the Land of Israel, Avraham expressed the concern that his relocation would appear disrespectful to his father.  In order to obey God's command, Avraham would have to leave his elderly father and settle in a distant country.  Avraham was so committed to his father – who was an idolater! – that he feared the implications of leaving him, even in compliance with the divine command.  God nevertheless insisted that Avraham settle in the Land of Israel, but in response to Avraham's concern He recorded Avraham's father's death in the Torah before the narrative of Avraham's journey to Israel (Bereshit 11:32).  In this way, those who read the Torah will not necessarily realize that Avraham left his father to move to the Land of Israel.

Yishak, too, exemplified the ideal of honoring parents through his obedient compliance at the time of the "Akeda," when God ordered Avraham to offer his son as a sacrifice.  Most people in Yishak's place would have refused to comply; Yishak could have challenged the accuracy of the prophetic vision his father claimed to have beheld, or claimed that God referred to his brother Yishmael, and not him.  But out of unbridled loyalty to his father, Yishak fully cooperated with Avraham, despite the fact that this was to have resulted in his own death.

Finally, Yaakov demonstrated the ideal of honoring parents when he obeyed his mother's instruction to disguise as Esav, so that he could receive Yishak's blessing.  He likewise displayed unwavering obedience when Rivka instructed him to leave home and go to Haran when Esav threatened to kill him.

Yosef thus followed the example of his predecessors and similarly showed great honor, respect and obedience to his father.

Our Sages teach that the final redemption will unfold in two stages: the first will be led by a leader from Yosef's descendants – Mashiah Ben Yosef – and the second will take place under the leadership of the Messianic king, a descendant of King David.  The first stage will be led by the tribe of Yosef because of Yosef's commitment to "Kibud Av."  The Rabbis tell us that the current exile, which was brought about by the nation of Edom, the descendants of Esav, has endured because of the great merit Esav accrued by respecting his father.  Yishak enjoyed fresh meat, and Esav would endanger himself in the woods hunting game to serve his father.  The only way we can overthrow the rule of Esav and leave the current exile is by committing ourselves to the highest standards of "Kibud Av," by respecting our parents to the very best of our ability.  For this reason, the final redemption will begin under the leadership of the tribe of Yosef, who neutralizes the merit of Esav through his own self-sacrificing commitment to his parents.

Today, unfortunately, people find all kinds of excuses to absolve themselves of their responsibilities to their parents.  When the parent makes a request, the response is, very often, something along the lines of "I don't have time"; "I'm too busy"; "I'm too tired"; "Why don't you ask my brother"; or "Ask me next week."  As opposed to Yosef, who declared, "Hineni," expressing his fervent desire to fulfill his father's wishes, today we have a tendency to shirk our responsibilities as children whenever possible.  We must follow Yosef's example and train our children to do the same, so that we can oppose the merit of Esav and help bring our nation out of the exile of Edom to which we have been subjected for so many centuries.

Sefer/Parasha:
Parashat Haye-Sara: Making a Profit
Parashat Vayera- Imposing Personal Stringencies Upon Others
Parashat Lech Lecha- "To Endear the Land to Him"
Parashat Noah- Protecting Ourselves from the Flood
Parashat Bereshit- "Adam" – The Essence of Man
Succot Derasha- Sukkot and Yaakov Avinu; and Some Halachot on Succot
Aseret Yime Teshuva Insight- The Obligation of Teshuva
Parashat Ki Tetze- Treating Sinners as Brothers
Parashat Shofetim- Decision and Execution
Parashat Re’ei- Give and Take
Parashat Ekev- Look Ahead, Not Back
Parashat VaEtchanan- What Happens to Unanswered Prayers?
Parashat Devarim- Actions and Intentions
Parashat Matot- Accountability for Sinful Intent
Parashat Pinhas- Zimri and the Compromising of Religion
1002 Parashot found